Chapter 10, Part II: Is Family Planning “User-Friendly”?
“Although more teens are practicing contraception? and doing so consistently and early, premarital pregnancies continue to rise.†? [1]
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? December 1986 Lou Harris Poll? commissioned by Planned Parenthood? compared the outcomes? of three models of sex education? relative to sexual activity.? Whether the school was teaching the students or the parents, results were said to be similar.? ?
According to the poll, the most sexually active? students (47%) were those who received information on both anatomy AND contraception.? Twenty-eight percent (28%) of students who received no sex information at all were sexually active.? The LEAST sexually active (24%) students were those who received information on anatomy and relationships, but NOT contraceptive information.? It seems that one percent of students were unaccounted for.
Carol Everett was part owner in three
“First, I established myself with the teens as an authority on sex.? I explained to them that their parents wouldn’t help them with their sexuality, but I would.? I separated them from their support system, number one, and they listened to me.
“Second, our doctors prescribed low dose birth control? pills with a high pregnancy rate knowing well that they needed to be taken very accurately at the same time every day or pregnancy would occur.? This insured the teens to be my best customers as teenagers typically are not responsible enough to follow such rigid medication guidelines on their own.? I knew their sexual activity would increase from none or once a week to five or seven times a week once they were introduced to this contraception? method.? Then I could reach my goal - three to five abortions for each teenager between the ages of 13 and 18.
“I believe I eventually saw three to five out of every class at some point.? I experienced a huge influx of gynecological business right after each lecture.? The phone rang off the wall the next day.? As they ‘needed’ abortions they called me up and said, ‘Remember when you were at our school?’?
“The process is this–get them thinking about it–then they call about birth control? pills? or some method of contraception–then they become sexually active.?
“Available statistics show that both teen pregnancy? and teen abortions decline after a parental involvement law is enforced.
“Parents need to ensure there are school policies that make parents aware of outside interest groups giving presentations to students.? This would enable parents to request that their child be excused from class if the parent deems the materials/subject matter inappropriate.†? [2]? ?
This author recommends that school districts implement an “opt in†policy (rather than “opting outâ€) which guarantees that parents have provided consent? for their child to attend certain classes which may be controversial or possibly not be consistent with the values? of some students’ homes.? The “opt out†policy singles out students, making them feel obvious and uncomfortable.
Many of us know of high school couples who became pregnant while believing they were “protected†since they were using “contraception.� Somewhere along the line perhaps through friends, TV, the classroom, a counselor, health practitioner or elsewhere, the abstinence? message was minimized or undermined. Young people are being “fed a line†and given a false sense of security by those who encourage them to “be safe†by being “protected.� Such “safety nets†sound too good to pass up.? The couple becomes pregnant and realizes too late that they would have been MORE protected if they didn’t think they were so “protected,†because perhaps they would have abstained.? Contracepting teens are being denied the protective concerns of those who practice and are protected by abstinence.?
Shouldn’t those who promote the use of contraception? be held legally and financially responsible for the consequences?? Who is responsible when a minor becomes pregnant as a consequence of using contraceptives? as counseled or referred, incurs medical bills, sterility and scaring due to STDs? while practicing “safe sex†as encouraged by a teacher, counselor, social worker, or classroom guest speaker, dies of AIDS? while practicing “safe sex†as taught, becomes sterile as a consequence of taking the Pill? at a young age because her body never “learned†to ovulate?
Brain changes can occur due to taking the “Pill†since “estrogens help in the development of the brain–the peddling of the Pill to minors? will affect the development of their brain in ways unknown at present. ? It will take many years to see the result of this tampering with normal brain development.? It took 20 years to find out the bad ‘side’ effects of DES.†? [3]
There are those who spout the line “Abstinence is best, BUT–be realistic, teens are going to be sexually active? anyway so it’s best they be ‘protected.â€? I have heard such statements from those? who really care about, and are involved in, the educational leadership of our young people.? They say they would rather that sexually active teens use contraception, EVEN THOUGH THEY KNOW THIS DOESN’T PROTECT THEM FROM DISEASE.
? Whether they realize it or not, such people are saying they would rather see our young people die of AIDS? or become infected with diseases rather than accept any child they may bear!!? This tells our young people that having a child is worse than having a disease or dying, and that is NOT a positive message to give our youth!
I had the good fortune of being invited to speak to a group of pregnant and parenting teens that lived in a community facility.? These young ladies were very street wise, and I wasn’t sure how they would accept my message of secondary virginity, and the importance of delaying sex until marriage.? At first only a few young ladies were present.? I began to notice that as one would leave, several more would show up. Eventually, the sofas and chairs were full of pregnant and parenting teens.
? What struck me most about these young ladies was their appreciation for the truth.? When they read the article titled “The Truth About ‘Safe Sex’ Leaks Out At Last†from the April 2, 1992, issue of The Washington? Times, and saw the graphic which showed that sperm is larger than the intrinsic pores of a latex condom, while the AIDS? virus? was much smaller than the pores, their response of “Why didn’t someone tell us?†carried a tone of one who has just learned that they had been misled.? The teens repeated this same statement when they learned that the Pill? chemically alters the lining of the uterus to prevent a child from implanting when it is 7-11 days old.?
During my visit one teen mother said, “We know abstinence? is best, but what’s second best?â€? I answered, “I won’t misguide you, I won’t mislead you - there is no second best.? Even if you use contraceptives? you can STILL get pregnant, STILL get sexually-transmitted diseases and even if you use a condom, you can STILL die of AIDS, and there are no contraceptives strong enough or condoms big enough to protect one from a broken heart.â€
Being pregnant and having the responsibility of raising a child is NOT the best situation for ANY teen, but many pregnant teens go on to live productive lives.? It means they will have to work harder to achieve their goals, and it may take longer, but it can be done.? It may even mean they will have to alter their goal, but the life of a child is well worth whatever is necessary.?
Reality is what we make it.? Teens CAN and DO abstain from sex, especially if they consistently receive this message from adults.? “Safe sex†is a deadly and expensive lie.? It puts the health of our teens at great risk.? It: sends a message of lowered expectations (you’re EXPECTED to be sexually active, so–); undermines the values, faith and support of families and teens who espouse and practice abstinence; sends the inconsistent message to “just say no†to drugs, but taking contraceptive drugs (even though they may negatively effect one’s health) is encouraged; provides a lack of direction; offers less than the best to those most at-risk? of not receiving the abstinence message at home; is perceived as “permission†to be sexually active since one must plan ahead FOR sex in order to be “responsible†and “prepared†with contraceptives;? reduces women to a “piece of meat†available for “safe†use; provides a false sense of security resulting in: pregnancy, abortion, drugs, alcohol, suicide, poverty, sexually-transmitted diseases, post-abortion syndrome, AIDS, death, side effects? of contraceptive chemicals, and a low sense of self-esteem for both the mother and her child who is considered a “contraceptive failure.â€?
The graphic titled “There’s Gold in Them Thar Kids ‘Dead Or Alive’†which is located on the following page, provides an overview of industries whose existence depends on sex and the use of contraception.? Imagine the amount of money spent on writing, marketing and purchasing sex education? materials.? A market is created for additional teachers.? More taxes? are needed to pay their salaries, and benefits.? There is additional expense in the hiring of substitute teachers when the regular classroom teacher must attend inservice? training? and workshops, as well as the expense of registration to attend state and national comprehensive health? conferences, etc.?
There is money in selling contraceptive drugs and devices.? There was an increased “need†for more Medicaid? dollars when the state of
The ONLY sure way not to become pregnant, contract? and die of AIDS, become infected with sexually-transmitted diseases? avoid the emotional, physical, psychological and spiritual consequences of premarital sex, is to ABSTAIN until marriage - and then remain faithful.? ?
Abstinence is possible, and is a reality for many people who have postponed sex until marriage.? It’s really not that bad - while we’re expected to abstain from drugs FOREVER, we only abstain from sex until we’re married!!!? Who wants to risk their health and entire future by taking chances?
Talk is cheap.? “Sweet nothings†may be bait for sex which may mean very little or nothing when you later find out that the romancer was not really interested in anything more than a one-night stand, or at least not a lifetime commitment.? Commitment is: staying to work things out when it’s easier to run, putting the needs of others before your wants, staying up all night with a sick child, understanding that every relationship has its ups and downs but time heals, commitment means being forgiving, being faithful to your marriage vows and spouse - in good times and bad, not giving in to temptation, and more.? True love is a commitment for a lifetime - “till death us do part.� Delaying sex until marriage is a test of committed love and respect.?
If an individual is not disciplined enough to abstain from sex before marriage, can that individual be trusted as a spouse to be faithful?? If sexually active? couples marry out of a sense of “obligation,†feelings of resentment and entrapment may later surface during times of tension and conflict.
One’s actions before marriage does affect the rest of their life, and the lives of others as well.?
[1] Planned Parenthood, Family Planning Perspectives, Vol. 12, No. 5, Sept./Oct. 1980, p. 230.
[2] Carol Everett ,“Selling Teens Abortion-Parents Beware,†Easton Publishing Co.;
[3] J.C. Espinosa, M.D., Birth Control Why Are They Lying To Women?, p. 34.